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Wot gets me goat, though? Them snobs who reckon it’s low-class. Oi, mate, loosen up! Had me ragin’ once—some toff in Westminster bangin’ on about “decency,” while I’m like, “Bruv, chill, it’s just a massage with extras!” Happy as a pig in muck, I’d be, sprawled out, oil drippin’, some bird whisperin’ sweet nothings. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect it’d be so… posh-like? Thought it’d be all seedy, but nah, some places are swanky—marble floors, the lot!

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Finally, I got home, and my mom was waiting with dinner. She made my fave—spaghetti! But then she dropped the whole pot on the floor. I was like, “Seriously?!” We both just stood there, staring at the mess. It was hilarious and infuriating at the same time.

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